I think today I started realising what work is all about and how it should make you feel. To be honest, I am still trying to put it into words but in the end it will all make sense.
So let’s get going.
In one of my previous articles I was talking about the Inner Child and why listening and learning to deal with it is so important. It tells you what you love and what you don’t. It let’s you recognise your true nature.
But do you also remember situations when you got this nice toy for christmas and within a few hours you were already bored by it? I want to argue that this is not your inner child, but to be totally honest, I only started realising today, that I have interpreted a lot of things to be motivated by my inner child when they haven’t actually. I almost get the feeling that when that happens it is based on pure desire, wishes and wants, and once you get what you want, you lose interest, because the desire goes away. But an inner child does never react like that. Is that possible? I almost think that an inner child never feeds of the desire of wanting something, but rather of true being. I also believe that the inner child is something that you can act upon immediately whereas a desire is something you cannot easily end. Wishes, desired and dreams, like wanting a big car, might never happen. Does it matter? No not really. But let’s say you feel like being an author, or a fisherman, or anything else, you can basically start with it right aways. You can start to write a book, or you can start taking fishing lessons, even while you are still at your regular job.
Remember when you were younger, you might have been part of a sports club or orchestra. Once a week you would go and be part of it, this is my understanding of taking care of your inner child. You wanted to go back, every week. It was important and you never got bored enough to just stop.
Now here is how this translate to finding work you truly love. Right now, you might have a job to pay for your mortgage or your next holiday. But all those things are more wishes and desires. So you work to quiet your wishes and desires. (Gosh, now that I am writing this, I realise how ridiculous we live – do we honestly waste our time with a job we hate just to fulfill our desires?) AHHH, I am not getting over this realisation. Does that also mean we never truly are who we are meant to be, because we confuse desire with true nature? This is a very important lesson right now. We live from desire to desire, we are busy quieting our wishes and dreams, but we never actually live our true nature. And this is why we can’t grow into who we are meant to be, this is also why growing up is so hard for some of us, this is why so many people are unhappy. Because in the end, having everything we ever desired, will leave us empty. Desires don’t let us grow into being better at something, or being a better person.
So here is what I believe helps us distinguish between who we are and what we desire, or even desire to be:
Work is like a hobby, you want to do it everyday, and you get better at it, or you develop something. It is like learning to play an instrument, a job is something that you start and eventually reach a goal with, but while you walk towards that goal you enjoy the ride. The word career is probably better to describe the growing process. A job to me is something that is the same every day, a career means you grow, develop or learn something.
This is not that easy to understand. You know the saying “the journey is the goal”, but that is not it. It is actually not true. Because that could mean having a regular job is what makes you very happy. Let’s say you work at a fast food restaurant – you do the same thing every day. For the last ten years you have been doing the same thing, here is my question, why did you live those ten years, if every day was the same? What changed? Why was it relevant to do the same thing for ten years. In school you learned something new everyday, so what changed? So saying “the journey is the goal” is not cutting it, you actually also need to get somewhere. Let first look at Friedrich Nietzsche’s quote: “The end if a melody is not its goal; but nonetheless, if the melody had not reached its end it would not have reached its goal either.”
So here is the important bit and actually something we have done through out our childhood but forgot about. Whatever we did, we made sure that while we were doing it, we worked hard and enjoyed it, but in the end also achieved something with it. Either we graduated or we were now a good musician or something else. Even nature forces us to grow, we grow physically, we eventually might become parents, then grandparents, etc. Growing older is the natural way of life. So why are we not doing the same with what we occupy our daily lives with. Why are so many people in a job that does not lead to anything. I use a very drastic examples now, it is almost like being addicted to drugs. You do the job to quiet your next desire. And of course it is never enough. Eventually you need more, hence you need to work harder at your very frustrating job. And then when you have saved up some more money, you go on the next shopping spree. If you are so addicted that you can’t wait any longer you might even get a loan to pay for your next holiday. And then what? The holiday sucks and you have to pay of the loan?
All this has nothing to do with who you truly are.
Listen to your inner child and start today with doing those things that reflect who you truly are, and you will see, step by step you will grow. You might only start an hour a week. You might start you own blog, like I just did. You might want to do something with cooking, or something social, or become a painter, or start your own business. The important thing is to realise that you can start today, everything else is a desire and not truly who you are.
What an AHA moment!! Start today and enjoy who you truly are, and you know that you are on the right way when you “ENJOY THE NOW”!